If I have made you feel less of a man pushing you to commit homicide in your noblest emotions I beg your forgiveness! 

 If I demanded strength and invincibility from you in all circumstances under the pretext that you are a man, I beg your forgiveness! 

 Crying has no gender, vulnerability has no sex!  Being fallible has no preference!  If you have ignored or repressed your feelings in order to exercise your most human right I beg your forgiveness!  Encouraging you to wear a mask of manhood to make me feel safe is a mistake!

You are a man because you are respectful, you are a man because you know how to apologize, you are a man because you know how to consider your physical privileges to put them at the service of others!  You are a man because you know how to defend yourself without fighting or raising your voice to scream at  the poor! You are a man when you dare to say no to prejudice!

You are not less of a man because the drawer in the living room is much heavier for you, you are not less of a man because you like pictures and you don’t drink alcohol, you are not less of a man because you never brag about your sexual performances, you are not less of a man because you earn less than me! 

In the future, I’m not going to robotize you because I understood one thing!  Doing it frustrates you and causes the damage I rightly complain about! 

 In the future I will let you be you, with strength or fragility.!  You are a father, you are a husband, you are a man but above all we share the same country of childhood and when we lived there I knew you were fragile, vulnerable, whiner as I adored our complicity!  Come back big but come back true! 

 I understood later on that the love and respect you have for your mother is linked to the way she treats you!  She is the only one who considers your humanity before anyone else!  In the future I wish us this beautiful love for a better future! 

 I will end with this quote from R. Green on equality (I don’t know why by the way): our times cherish equality but it should not be confused with uniformity.  Everyone must have equal opportunities to express their difference so that a thousand flowers will bloom.

Written by UMUTONIWASE Aliane.