Where Were You? Show Love to People While They’re Still Alive
Have you ever noticed how many people show up once someone is gone? The messages pour in, the photos are shared, the kind words flow. And yet, when that person was still here, struggling and hoping someone would notice, many of those voices were silent.
So I have to ask: where were you?
It’s Easier to Say Goodbye Than to Say “How Are You?”
Today, it’s so much easier to write “rest in peace” than to write “how are you?” It’s so much easier to find kind words in front of a grave than to write a letter of recommendation. It’s so much easier to find time in our schedule to attend a funeral than to find time to walk alongside a friend or family member through life.
It’s so much easier to talk about someone and criticize them behind their back than to face them and tell them, with kindness, what they could change.
We have become experts in tributes and beginners in presence. We know how to mourn, but we have forgotten how to accompany.
Don’t Follow This Trend
Please don’t follow this senseless trend. Don’t wait until I’m gone to love me and value the person I am.
Don’t wait until I no longer need you to declare your love for me. Don’t wait for the day my eyes close forever to post about me on all your social media accounts.
A beautiful post after someone dies won’t reach them. A simple message today might change their entire week. Sometimes “I’m thinking of you” is all a person needs to keep going.
Life Was Given to Us to Love Each Other
The Creator gave us this life to love one another and to enjoy the time we have together, not to bring back memories of people we never cared about when we had the chance.
Every day we spend with the people we love is a gift, and none of us knows how many of those days are left. Time doesn’t wait for us to be less busy, less tired or less proud.
If you want to show love and affection to someone, do it while there is still time. If you can recognize someone’s talent after they’re gone, support them while they’re still here. Buy their book, share their work, attend their event, tell them you believe in them. Now is the time!
Be There for the Living
If you can find time for a final tribute, find time for the battles that person is fighting today. Some people are carrying illness, loneliness, grief, debt or depression in silence. They don’t need flowers on a coffin. They need a hand to hold right now.
Be someone who loves life and the present moment, not someone who lives in nostalgia fed by regret and disguised as tenderness for someone who is no longer with us.
Regret is a heavy burden. The best way to avoid it is to act while the door is still open.
5 Simple Ways to Show Love Today
Showing love doesn’t require grand gestures. Here are a few simple things you can do today:
- Call instead of texting. Hearing your voice means more than you think.
- Visit someone you’ve been “meaning to see.” Stop postponing. Go this week.
- Say the words out loud. “I love you,” “I’m proud of you,” “Thank you for being in my life.” Don’t assume they already know.
- Support their dreams. Share their project, recommend their work, show up for their milestones.
- Listen without judging. Sometimes the greatest gift is your full attention.
None of these takes much time. All of them can mean the world to someone.
Love Now, Not Later
The people around us won’t be here forever, and neither will we. The words we hold back today may become the regrets we carry tomorrow.
So don’t save your kindness for funerals. Don’t save your compliments for eulogies. Don’t save your love for social media posts that the person will never read.
This is how I see life, and I had to say it.
Show love to people while they’re still alive. Tomorrow may be too late.
Who will you reach out to today? Tell me in the comments, then go send that message.
Written by Aliane UMUTONIWASE
